Top Ten Reasons to Revamp Your Blog.

I have had, not even bullshitting you, hundreds of blog ideas. 

Good ones. Admittedly.

I've never MADE one of those.

But I think about them, they float through my head and become beautiful images of splendor and popularity and everyone thinks they are awesome....

...then I wake up. And I remember, "wow, I have brilliance I simply cannot stretch between concept and completion."

In a more humble way, of course. Because I wouldn't be worthy to lick Ariatotle's shoes to be truthful. But that's not my point. 

In the existential mind-blowing admittance that a "mommy blog" dripping with sarcasm and wit is not anything new?

Well. I'm ok with that. 

So, I'm gonna jump in a much well acquainted and also very popular bandwagon (preferably one without a bum wheel) and transition this to a Top Ten blog.

Yes. They've been done. Yes. They've been overdone.

Yes, it sound reproachably horrifying.

Well, this one isn't.

It's MY top tens. 

That makes it badass. And different. And better. And you're gonna love it, bet your bottom dollar and whoop whoop, you are mine, Bitches. 

Anything and everything from "top ten reasons I just love being a mom" to the "top ten ten reasons to re-watch the Star Wars Trilogy".

Maybe I should make a "Top Ten Reasons to Abhorr your Autocorrect" since mine just corrected "Star Wars" to "Star Ears".

The fuck. Someone needs to update the mainframe of the autocorrect library, because c'mon. George Lucas just shivered in his everlasting sleep. 

Ashamed, I am. 

Bear with me, my friends. This might get interesting...or it might just be humorously foot-in-mouth.

It will be something. 

Afterthought:

10. Blogs are boring. Lists are good.

9. Opinions are like assholes, everyone has one; Some are still better than others. 

8. No one cares what a mom does. We all have one, she did stuff.

7. It's easy to repeat yourself when you talk about everything, but harder to repeat yourself when you are rating shit.

6. It's easier to talk about the MMA or Football through the eyes of a mom than it is to talk like a mom about the MMA or Football. 

5. Censorship fucking sucks. 

4. I got bored. 

3. My 3 readers (presumably) only liked this page because they like me, not what I said.

2. I plan to say a lot of shit people like just as much as they might possibly like me. 

1. More people care what a sarcastic crude woman thinks are the top ten than what a sarcastic, crude woman thinks about anything else, especially mom stuff.